Not so Good at Goodbyes

In my twenty years of existence I have come to understand that life has a funny way of giving us exactly what we need at the moments when we need it most. This has been proven true at many points throughout my lifetime, but it's been particularly accurate this semester. These past four months have been extremely challenging, beautiful, life changing, eye opening, validating, character building, and so much more, and for that I will be forever thankful. However all good things must come to an end, and so I must say my goodbyes. Goodbye to all of the incredible people that have made this the best semester of my life. Goodbye to the Happy Center and the unforgettable memories formed within its walls. Goodbye to room 303 in the Alma Mater Dormitory that I have come to call my home. Goodbye to group dinners in the Mensa. Goodbye to sitting in Piazza Maggiore and soaking up the sun while listening to amazing street musicians. Goodbye to walking 30 minutes to class and laughing with friends the entire way there. Goodbye to eating pizza and pasta for just about every meal. Goodbye to the beautiful city of Bologna…at least for now.

While I always recognized that saying goodbye at the end of this semester was an inevitable occurrence, I was certainly not prepared for how difficult it would be. The lovely people at my internship, the resilient migrants at my service site, the welcoming Italians in my dormitory, and the inspiring Americans in my program have become my reality, my routine, my support system, and my family. And now, after four months, I am forced to leave these people behind. However, I know that I will always carry little pieces of them within my heart and mind. I’ll always remember the memories we’ve made and the lessons they have taught me, and at the end of the day that is what matters. I will be thinking of and telling stories about the people I’ve met in Bologna for the rest of my life, and so their memory will live on forever in one way or another.

The rest of this post will cover my final travels of the semester, as well as some important Bologna memories from the past few weeks.

About a month ago I went on a solo trip to the Italian mountain town of Monzuno, where I stayed in a beautiful airbnb for one night. I took a 45 minute train ride to Monzuno from Bologna, where my host was waiting to meet me and drive us up to her mountain villa. Her name was Anna Maria, and she was truly one of the sweetest women I have ever met. The drive up to the villa was about 30 minutes, which gave us a good amount of time to chat and get to know each other (she spoke minimal English however, so I was really forced to use my best Italian haha). Anna Maria is a seventy-three-year-old retired fashion designer, and her and her husband, Franco, love being airbnb hosts because it allows them to meet and understand people from all over the world. She says that she never wants to stop being challenged and excited, and renting out their extra room to travelers allows for this goal to be achieved. When we finally arrived at the beautiful villa, we were greeted by her two adorable dogs. Anna Maria then led me to my living space, which was a full size kitchen, bedroom, bathroom, and patio that was totally separated from the rest of the house where she and Franco lived. By the time I checked in it was about noon, so I spent the rest of the day exploring the area, hiking, journaling, reading my book, doing research for my abundance of final papers, enjoying nature, jumping on the bed, dancing very poorly to Big Yellow Taxi by the Counting Crows, and much more. I also cooked myself pasta with pesto for dinner as the sun was setting, which was just the icing on the cake for a perfect day. It was undoubtedly the most beautiful sunset I have ever seen, but my phone died and my charger stopped working right as it was occurring. I think this was fate though, as it allowed me to really live in the moment and soak up the magical pink and red sky before me. Since I needed my phone to be charged in order to get on the train the next day, I ended up going down to Anna Maria and Franco’s house that night to see if they had an extra charger. They luckily had an extra one, and after they gave it to me we ended up chatting in their living room for a while about everything from handmade pasta to Italian politics. I eventually went to bed, and the next day squeezed in a morning walk and journaling session before Anna Maria took me down to the train station. It was overall a very successful solo trip, filled with much-needed relaxation, alone time, and reflection.

The week after my solo trip, I had to say goodbye to both the people at my service site and at my internship. The last day at my service site (the after school program between Italian students and teenage African migrants) was actually the last day for the program as well, which made it a particularly emotional day for everyone. Watching the students and migrants say goodbye to each other was really beautiful and heart breaking, as it was clear that they had truly built positive relationships and learned a lot from each other. I did not want my goodbye to take precedence over that of the students’, so I chose to stay more on the sidelines during the final moments. I sent out an email to the class the next day saying my thank you’s and goodbyes, but during that day it felt as though the best thing for me to do was be observant, take in the beauty of the program I had been lucky to be a part of, and offer emotional support if anyone needed it. Luckily I did not have to say goodbye to the migrants that day, because many of them had planned to come to an open-mic event called “America Night” that my program was putting on the next day. A few of them ended up coming, and it was really fun and exciting to spend time with them in a more relaxed and casual setting. We danced and talked for a long time, and eventually said our goodbyes at the end of the night. My supervisor also ended up coming, and she gave me a card that was signed by all of the migrants I had gotten to know. It was a really great way to end my experience with the beautiful people I met through Arca Di Noe, and I will never forget all of the amazing things they have taught me.

Saying goodbye to those at my internship was also very difficult, and I definitely shed a few tears before, during, and after my last day at the Happy Center. When we were about to start the English-Italian exchange class, one of the individuals handed me a beautiful purple gift bag. Enclosed was a bag of breadsticks that they all know I love, as well as a beautiful little necklace. In that moment I was so overwhelmed with emotions, joy, and gratitude that I had no idea what to say. So, I basically said “THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU” a million times in a row. It was so sweet and thoughtful of them to do such a thing, and it made me feel really special. Throughout the rest of the class, Chiara led them in an activity where each person was asked to say something I had given them, and something they had given me. It was a beautiful exercise, as it allowed them to express their thanks to me while also reflecting on their own gifts and strengths. Their answers were all incredibly poetic, sincere, and eloquent, and I will never forget how loved I felt in that moment. One of the most noteworthy answers was from a man that I had actually only met the day before. He told me that I had made a positive impact on him within simply five minutes of us knowing each other, and that he was certain I would continue to impact people in a positive way for the rest of my life. He then said that he wanted to give me the gift of song; the song “You’ve Got a Friend”, to be exact! He said that if I was ever feeling down or lonely that I was to think of this song and remember all the people at the Happy Center who care about me. To finish off the day, Chiara printed out the lyrics of the song and we all sang it together. It was the perfect end to my time at the Happy Center, as my internship there was one of the most character-building, challenging, exciting, inspiring, beautiful experiences I have ever had.

The following paragraphs detail the 10 day social justice trip I took in Greece with my study abroad program!

Day 1:

We landed in Athens around midday on Wednesday (May 18th), where we were greeted by our tour guide Ioanna. She was really funny, genuine, and nice, and it was clear that she knew a lot about the history of Greece. She also had a hilarious relationship with Todd, our program director, and their witty banter was very entertaining. When we first got to our hotel, we went on a walking tour of the city. It was beautiful, colorful, and full of life, and Ioanna truly helped us get acquainted to the layout of area. That night we went to a group dinner at a really nice authentic Greek restaurant, with many delicious courses. It was a beautiful night, and we spent about three hours eating, talking, and laughing together! That night a bunch of us went up to the rooftop of the hotel, where we danced and played Ukulele with the view of the illuminated Parthenon on the horizon.

Day 2:

Thursday morning we went to the Acropolis museum, which was really interesting. Our tour guide, Ioanna, helped to make it an even better experience because she knew literally everything there was to know about the Acropolis and the Parthenon. I am so impressed by her intelligence, and could not be more thankful for her presence on our trip. We then climbed up to the Parthenon, and the views from the top were absolutely stunning. I could have stayed up there for hours, just taking in the scenery. Next we went to a rooftop restaurant for lunch, where we got some amazing gyros. Unfortunately a woman had heat stroke at a table near ours, so many of the students and Ioanna were very active in getting her the help she needed. After about an hour the paramedics finally showed up and carried her down the stairs, but it was pretty frustrating to observe that almost no one else in the restaurant seemed to care about what was going on. After lunch we had a lot of free time to explore the city and shop, so some of my friends and I spent the remainder of the day downtown. For dinner a group of us went to eat at a rooftop bar, where I ordered french fries and a milkshake for dinner. Yes, I know, I am the pinnacle of health nowadays!! We finished off the night by hanging out on the roof of the hotel again, where we had some great conversations and good laughs.

Day 3:

We left early Friday morning to volunteer at Caritas, a welcome center for refugees in Athens. I had volunteered at a Caritas in Italy before, so being able to compare the two organizations was very interesting for me. One of the main differences was the type of people they are serving, as Italy is mainly dealing with an influx of African migrants whereas Greece is receiving more migrants from the Middle East. One of the social workers at the center spoke to us for a while when we arrived, explaining the work they do and answering all of our questions. Everyone in my program is incredibly intelligent, inquisitive, and creative, so I always love hearing the questions that they come up with when we have guest speakers. After the presentation we were divided up into groups and told to go to different areas of the Caritas. My friend Lanie and I were assigned to the children’s room for the first half of the day, and it was a really unique experience. While I have worked with kids since I was very young, I had never been in a situation where I was watching over and playing with children who did not speak the same language as me. Many of the children and their parents spoke only Arabic or Greek, so it was initially difficult to communicate with them and ensure that they felt comfortable. Lanie and I eventually figured it out, however, as we began relying on nonverbal communication skills such as smiling, gesturing, waving, and laughing. The kids we met were absolutely adorable, and some of them had realllyyyy big personalities. It was genuinely inspiring to see that after all these kids had been through, they were still able to smile, laugh, and find joy in playing with a plastic toy kitchen. After working with the kids we headed to the clothing room, where we helped sort clothes for a few hours. Lastly, we went down to the kitchen to eat lunch with the rest of our group. Some of my other friends had spent their day in the soup kitchen, and it was really interesting to hear about their experience and their encounters with the migrants. We then helped clean up our dishes and walked over to a building in the city center to have a meeting with a woman who works for the American Embassy in Athens. She talked to us about her job description, the state of the migration crisis in Greece, some projects the American embassy is working on, and the process of becoming a foreign service officer. I learned a lot from her, and was very thankful that she was able to take the time out of her busy schedule to come and talk to us. That night a bunch of friends and I went to get drinks at a few bars, which was really fun and a great way to wrap up our time in Athens.

Day 4:

Saturday morning we boarded onto the bus and headed off for a long drive to Meteora. We took a few stops along the way, including at a museum and for lunch, but eventually arrived in the beautiful town of Meteora in late afternoon. We had a lot of free time when we arrived, so I decided to go down to the city center by myself and explore. I ended up finding this really cute coffee shop where I journaled and drew for a long time, which was really relaxing and a good opportunity to reflect on the trip so far. I then went back to the hotel to get ready for dinner, and we all walked together to a little tavern down the road. It was a delicious meal, and Ioanna told us all about her peace walk from Athens to Istanbul, how she met the Dalai Lama, and so much more. She is an incredible human, and I am so grateful for the opportunity to have gotten to know her throughout our time in Greece. After dinner a few of us went and sat on a large rock formation and did some star gazing. It was very serene and beautiful. Later we went back and hung out on the roof for a little while, and Kelly, Emily, and I actually ended up sleeping there. Falling asleep next to two of my best friends beneath a star-filled sky is something I will never ever forget.

Day 5:

Sunday we spent the majority of the morning hiking up a very steep path to the top of the Great Monastery in Meteora. We did the hike as a silent walking meditation, which I really enjoyed. It made me realize that such a meditation is a really good metaphor for life itself. You are focused on getting yourself to the top, while subconsciously following in the footsteps of those who came before you and eased your path. You are also always setting an example for those who follow, and they will inevitably be able to learn and reroute their journey as a result of any wrong steps you take. Additionally, you feel like you are alone until you or someone else needs help or is in danger. If someone falls, everyone around them exits their state of self-interest in order to ensure that the fallen person is alright. Maybe that last part is not always accurate to life, but it certainly should be. Anyways, once we got to the top of the monastery we were able to gain insight into the monastic lifestyle and history. We saw their old kitchens, cellars, sacred spaces, and so much more. We then headed down to the city center to grab lunch, and afterwards made our journey to the city where Mount Olympus is located. When we got to the hotel a bunch of us hung out in the pool for a while, and then we all went to dinner at a nearby restaurant. It was a delicious meal with many courses and lots of wine!

Day 6:

Monday we hiked Mount Olympus, and on the bus ride to the start of the hiking trail we had an intense dance party. It was so much fun, and a great way to start the day (I lost my MIND to ignition by R-Kelly, of course. lol). Anyways, the views that we encountered on the hike were some of the most beautiful I have ever seen. The hike itself was a few hours long, but we had a few stops along the way to give us the opportunity to truly take in the beauty that surrounded us. One of my favorite moments on the hike was when we stopped at a river, and a bunch of people swam in it. It was by far the coldest water I had ever touched, but some individuals from our trip decided to take a dip. I just remember sitting on a rock and watching all the beautiful people in my program smiling and laughing with each other, and it made me more joyful than I could ever explain. We also stopped at a cool cave, where we refilled our water bottles with ice cold mountain water..delicious!! Finally we made it to the top of the mountain, where we were greeted by a wonderful monk. He talked to us about spirituality, the world, his life, and much more, and after a little while he opened up the floor to questions. I asked him what he thought the secret to happiness was, and he basically said that it was loving others unconditionally. I like his answer, but I’m not 100% sold on it. I’ve got a little bit of time left to figure it out though, so maybe I’ll reach out to him when I have decided for myself haha. After talking with the monk we went to an adorable little tapas restaurant on a river, where we spent a majority of the day. We ended up hanging out by the river for a little while longer, and then later that night went to get gelato. A huge group of us passed by one of our program coordinators getting his beard trimmed in a barber shop on the way to gelato too, which was absolutely hilarious. Our program director was sitting there with him like a proud father watching his son get his first haircut at kidsnips...it was truly a sight to see.

Day 7:

Tuesday we left for Thessaloniki, but on the way there we stopped at a really cool museum where we saw the tomb of Alexander the Great’s father, Philip II. The tomb was incredibly impressive, and the gold wreaths and treasures in the museum were also very interesting to see and learn about. Next we went to Naoussa, one of the most important wine growing regions in Greece. We toured the winery of the Boutaris family in order to learn about how wine is made, and then sampled a variety of wines produced at the vineyard. Ioanna is a third level sommelier, which means that she is a very advanced wine taster. As a result, she was able to educate us on the systematic approach to wine tasting. The wine was delicious, and probably some of the best I will ever have the pleasure of drinking. Afterwards we took the bus the rest of the way to Thessaloniki and checked into our lovely hotel. We later went on a walking tour of the city, followed by a dinner in the downtown area.

Day 8:

On Wednesday we started the day with a visit to the Jewish museum in Thessaloniki. The city used to have a very large Jewish population before World War Two, and so the museum provided us with a unique glance into the lives and stories of those affected by the Holocaust. Next we went to an old prison which has been converted into a museum. It was really interesting and heartbreaking to see the actual grounds on which prisoners lived in the past. Afterwards we visited the UNESCO world heritage site of the Roman Rotunda, which was beautiful and had a rich history. The rotunda operated as a church for over a thousand years until the city fell to the Ottomans in the late 1500s. It was then converted into a mosque, and a minaret was built to complete the transition. The rotunda remained a functioning mosque until the Greeks captured the city during the Balkan War in the early 1900s. It was then converted back into a church, serving as a concrete representation of the tensions between Greece and the Turkey. After that we went to lunch as a group at a very cute authentic Greek restaurant, and it was delicious. We then headed back to the hotel, swam and journaled on the rooftop for a little while, and got drinks later that night to celebrate Derek’s birthday. It was a really fun night filled with lots of good talks and lots of good laughs.

Day 9:

Thursday started with a presentation from a speaker who works for the government in Thessaloniki and specializes in refugee and migration matters. He gave us a very in-depth analysis of the history of migration in Europe, explaining how and why the migration crisis has become so dire today. This was very interesting, as it provided a lot of context for the issues we had been confronting and talking about all semester. Afterwards a few of us went to swim and hang out by the pool for a few hours, which was really fun and relaxing. Later that day my friend Ellie went to get a tattoo, and a few other people and I accompanied her there. We ended up finding a super cool tattoo parlor in the more hipster area of town, and the people in the shop were awesome. They did a great job on Ellie’s tattoo, and were fun to talk to as well. Following the tattoo shenanigans, we headed back to the hotel to get ready for the group dinner that night. Since it was our last night in Greece, we were having a banquet dinner party to celebrate. It ended up being a night I will never forget, filled with great food, tasty wine, and the best company. In order to show my gratitude to everyone in the program, I wrote out a speech earlier that day to give at dinner. I was very emotional while speaking, so it wasn’t necessarily an Oscar winning performance or anything haha. It certainly felt good to express myself, though, and the overwhelming love and support that I received from everyone really made me smile. After dinner a bunch of us walked to the water and spent some time there just hanging out and reflecting on the trip. It was an incredible night, full of love, friendship, joy, and a bit of sadness about our fast-approaching goodbyes.

Day 10:

On Friday morning we had the pleasure of listening to two speakers. The first was a woman who worked for the Mayor, and she was very knowledgeable about all of the current ways that Thessaloniki is currently working to help refugees. She talked about certain programs that are in place, as well as challenges they have encountered as a city and as a country. The next speakers were from a non profit organization called ARSIS (The Association for the Social Support of Youth). ARSIS’ main target is the prevention of youth marginalisation, the elaboration of policies which defend youth rights, and the active social support towards disadvantaged young people. They provide psychosocial, legal, and educational support to young refugees living in Thessaloniki. The two women representing ARSIS gave a very inspiring presentation, and I left feeling happy and hopeful as a result of seeing that kind hearted people are out there truly making a difference in the world. After the two presentations, a bunch of us went to the rooftop pool for a final swimming session. However, when we arrived there were about 50 people already up there. It almost looked like a Miami, Florida spring break party, but with men ranging from age 23 to age 63...absolutely hilarious! We ended up talking to some of them and figured out that all of the people were from a construction agency, and this was a group vacation sponsored by the company to thank them for their work. After a few hours on the rooftop it was time to head to the airport, so we all gathered our luggage and hopped onto the bus for our final journey as a group. The flight went smoothly and we all got back in one piece, but the next few days in Bologna were filled with lots of goodbyes and tears. Everyone basically left Saturday or Sunday, and so those 48 hours consisted of heartfelt goodbyes to people that have truly changed my life. Saying goodbye really pains me because I feel like those I am leaving never fully understand the impact they have had on my life, so I ended up writing letters to everyone in the program in order to better capture all of my feelings. I still don’t think the letters accomplished this well enough, but I suppose it was better than nothing at all.

In the weeks that followed the end of my program I stayed on a boat airbnb in Barcelona, visited my college friends in Madrid, and spent a week with my family travelling around Italy. These were all amazing trips that I am so thankful for, and they allowed me to wrap up my time in Italy quite nicely. Now I am back in Glenview, IL where I will spend my summer working as a fundraising intern for a Chicago-based company called DialogueDirect. Being home has been pretty weird so far, as my open schedule and familiar surroundings are very different from the fast-paced and new environment of living in a foreign country. However, as previously stated, all good things must come to an end. I have had an incredible semester, but now is the real challenge: taking everything I’ve learned and applying it to my normal life. I am very proud of all the positive growth I have made over these past four months, and I am looking forward to continuing on this cycle of personal development throughout the summer and beyond.

Thank you to anyone who has actually taken the time to read my silly words this semester! This blog has served as a very important reflection tool for me, and the thought that other people might possibly enjoy it too truly makes me smile. Much love, and ciao for now!